Sincerity Strengthens The Child’s Emotional Intelligence
Imagine that a child breaks a plate and that mom or dad comes right away to scold him. The child then decides to lie to avoid being reproached. The climate created can be unsustainable. Sincerity in childhood is slowly lost because even children, like adults, do not like to be scolded for every mistake they make.
What can we do? For one thing, encouraging values such as sincerity from childhood is very good for the child. To the point that it also improves his emotional intelligence. To prevent the child from lying when he makes a mistake or refuses to do something, it is necessary to create a positive atmosphere in which problems can be exposed and discussed. Thus, unpleasant situations will not turn into dramas.
We have chosen the classic example of the broken pot, but there are many situations in which a child can think of winning by lying. When he doesn’t want to eat something, when he doesn’t want to do his homework, when he doesn’t want to go to sleep, etc.
How sincerity strengthens a child’s emotional intelligence
Through the value of sincerity, the child also strengthens self-esteem. That is why it is important that parents, educators or guardians do not use the lie to guide their behavior.
As the child grows up, he learns to recognize the difference between lie and truth. There comes a time when she may find that many of the lessons she received from her parents weren’t real. Thus he understands that parents, and by extension the adult world they represent, approve of lying as a means to achieve goals.
From the age of five, the child is already capable of being skeptical of certain statements. It is a critical moment in which he sees adults as a role model. And it will be even more complicated after age eight, when he learns to confidently separate intentional error from deception.
When he begins to distinguish the possibilities that come with lying, without understanding the damage it can do, it can be difficult to go back. The human being has very powerful mental mechanisms of selective blindness. This is why it is important to know the elements that we can exploit so that the child takes the path of sincerity, accepting his own mistakes and limitations.
How to teach the value of sincerity
Including assertiveness in a child’s upbringing is one of the best ways to teach him the value of sincerity. We can explain that the truth is his right, that he can expect no one to lie to him or try to manipulate him. A right that also applies to others.
In his natural evolution, the child learns to recognize good and evil, to take responsibility for his mistakes, to find alternatives to overcome obstacles and to achieve his goals. Most importantly, learn from love and reasonable judgment. For this, the following is recommended.
Do not judge
A child, especially when he is very young, does nothing with bad intentions. If we judge him continuously, we block his possibility of reasoning and reflecting, and we are unable to analyze whether there are reasons that perhaps escape us. What is behind the lie? Before judging, let’s study the situation and talk to the little one.
Listen actively
It is interesting to listen carefully to the child, without being impulsive. This way we will understand him better and we will be able to analyze if he lies, imagines stories or if he has an intention other than telling the truth.
Correct assertively to convey the value of sincerity
On many occasions we find ourselves forced to correct the child. It’s normal, it’s part of his upbringing. We must try, however, to be assertive, so the little one can internalize better and in the future he will think before acting.
Reinforce in a positive way
It is always important to use positive reinforcement. If the child acts fairly and honestly, we will reward him by showing that we appreciate his behavior.
In this way, we increase the chances that it will repeat the same conduct or others that go in the same direction; on the other hand, the chances of unwanted behaviors occurring are limited.
Good or bad, you are his role model
Adults, parents or guardians are the example that the child follows. It is useless to say one thing if we then act differently. If we want to teach the value of sincerity, the best choice is to be ourselves the example that the child needs.
Do not forget that the child tends to imitate the figure with more authority, therefore parents, teachers or older brothers and sisters. We have a great responsibility when we act in front of a child.
Also remember that sincerity strengthens the child’s emotional intelligence. If you want your children to be self-reliant, responsible and self-confident, they need to know their emotions well.